A Tale Of Two Cells And The Ensuing Observation

27^th January-2010

It was yet another feeling of deja-vu.. I felt my trouser's pocket a little bit lighter and for sure my heart skipped a beat or two.. I knew that it is gone, but didn't have courage to feel for it.. Then after a couple of seconds, I felt for it, touching my trouser's pocket lightly and then frantically.. Indeed it was gone, my Nokia N70 cell phone.. And it was not just the monetary loss; along with it, I also lost many other things which we tend to keep in our cell phones these days.. It had all my contacts for which I didn't have any backup anywhere.. Numerous messages from my friends and dear ones which I always like to keep with me.. Then it had a number of snaps taken which the big lazy I am, had not transferred to my system yet.. Ironically, just the evening before, I had decided to take a back up of all the stuff stored in my cell but couldn't since my computer had some problems! Truth took some more moments to sink in completely.. After initial shock, I came back to the real world trying to come up in terms with the fact that my cell phone has been stolen, just 100 odd meters away from my office, that too in a Volvo! While getting down from the Volvo, I looked around and saw other people coming out; I knew one among these had my Cell phone but there was little I could do with everyone diverging quickly in different directions.. I saw a co-employee and requested to let me use his cell phone which he promptly gave and I dialed my own number and was not surprised to find it "switched-off"! It is strange that how we keep hoping always, that too against all hopes; never accepting the fact when something bad has happened! Anyway, so it was gone.. I started towards my office feeling agonized, frustrated and cheated.. I felt like writing a whole book on the need of honesty and morality at that moment.. Jokes apart, on a serious note this incident certainly made my confidence take a little beating since I always used to feel strange that how can someone steal your wallet or cell phone from your pocket without letting you know.. For once, I have known how do they do it and they sure are very very smart people, much more smarter than we think them to be..

What makes life strange is the unexpected ironies it throws when we expect them least and in the process giving unimaginable twists into the turns of the events.. In midst of an annoyed and agonized state of mind, I couldn't help but remember an event which still looks like a scene from some book with stories on acts of goodness done by some great people.. I will try to keep it brief, so please read on..

It was my 5th semester in college and the kind of remote place 'Gunupur' is wherein my college is situated; even the word 'remote place' appears to add a touch of modernity to it.. So as expected, Cell phones arrived late with BSNL being the only operator.. SIM cards were a big thing and were being sold in black at the rate of Rs. 1K to 1.5K.. ‘Demand vs Supply’ theory of economics from 1^st semester came into my mind and I decided to get my SIM through regular process.. It is not that I was trying to lend some balance to the whole set of uneven proportions in the demand supply thing, it’s just that I found the price quite appalling and it certainly didn’t appeal to me to purchase a SIM card at that high price.. So it took some 12 months and finally I received my much awaited SIM card..

8^th September-2005

I still remember the day, it was overcast when I left for nearby town 'Parlakhemundi', an equally 'remote' town with the exception that it was a little bigger and had a counter where one could get the railway ticket reservations done.. I had gone there to reserve tickets for upcoming 'Dussera' vacation.. As soon as I reached there, it started raining heavily.. Somehow I reached the ticket booking counter and was in for a big disappointment since it was closed! So I boarded the bus for return journey.. Buses in that part of our country are fully air conditioned since by default they come with all the windows broken and should I say 'Rain conditioned' too because of the leaking roof/ ceiling? (Yes the holes and cracks are all the way through and force of gravity makes the water seep through roof and it reaches the other side we know as ceiling and then drench the poor passengers sitting inside in the process, again because of gravity).. Needless to say, it was a terrible journey and for the next three hours I was getting drenched completely and continuously.. Complete in combination with continuous can be indeed dreadful..

'Gunupur' is a small town with my college situated at one end and 6 KM away from it, at the other end of the stretch is the main bus stand from where the road takes a curve and relines with the stretch after completing a small circle giving the whole thing a shape of the alphabet 'P'. Inhabitants of the town live along both sides of this 'P'.. Any bus which comes from Parlakhemundi's direction crosses my college first.. So we used to get down right at the entrance of our college..

With floodgates of sky still wide open, my destination arrived and I hurried my way out of the bus to take a shelter at a nearby closed shop.. It was then that I realized this.. And it was not a feeling of deja-vu; since it had happened for the first time with me.. I felt my trouser's pocket a little bit lighter and for sure my heart skipped a beat or two.. I knew that it is gone, but didn't have courage to feel for it.. Then after a couple of seconds, I felt for it, touching my trouser's pockets lightly and then frantically.. Indeed it was gone, my first cell phone.. Of course it was a BIG monetary loss; specially since I was a college going guy.. Fact that I had waited for the SIM for 1 year made the things worse.. Another fact that I had recharged it worth the value of Rs. 1200 just the day before added salt to the wounds.. It was a simple Nokia model with very limited features, but still it meant a fortune to me in those days.. Losing contacts and messages was not a headache; it didn't had any pictures, it didn't have a camera in first place! So it was a pure monetary loss.. Truth took some more moments to sink in completely.. After initial shock, I came back to the real world trying to come up in terms with the fact that my cell phone is lost, just in front of my College's entrance.. Somehow it had slipped out of my trouser's pocket.. I looked around and there was no one around me.. That incident certainly had made my confidence take a little beating since I always used to feel strange that how someone can lose a cell phone or wallet! How can someone be so much careless! And for once, I had discovered how, had discovered that I too can be so much careless..

But at that time, I reacted a little differently.. I didn't start walking towards my college silently.. Rather the very next moment I found myself giving a futile attempt to chase down the bus! Not all of us inherit the gifted athletic features and have I had those, then too I was no match for a bus in full swing and I wasn't surprised to be left far behind.. So I looked in the opposite direction and saw another bus coming.. I raised my hand requesting it to stop.. It didn't.. I saw another one coming and I knew that I need to take a decision.. And there I was, in middle of the isolated road with trees on both sides and sky down pouring, with both my hands outstretched in front of a speeding bus.. At least one person there still had the sanity intact, Bus slowed down and I jumped inside.. Driver gave me an ugly and angry look.. He demanded in irritated voice what the hell I think I was doing in telugu dialect of hindi.. I tried to make him understand in shortest possible sentences; making a conscious effort not to confuse or infuriate him any further.. He asked me just two questions; "You left your cell phone? Was the bus coming from Parlakhemundi?” I nodded twice in affirmation.. I felt the bus speeding.. Conductor came to me asking me to buy ticket and was shooed away by the driver.. Driver signaled me to take a seat.. From there, he refused to stop the bus even at the places where other passengers needed to get down.. Very soon we were nearing the main bus stand.. Despite all the stunts, I was convinced about the fact that there is no way I will be getting the cell phone because by this time, someone must have picked it up from the seat where I had left it.. Population leads to crowding which in turn leads to crimes, the analyst in me thought.. Very soon, the 'other' bus was visible and I gasped.. The Bus driver started honking frantically as soon as we were behind the 'other' bus.. Conductor of the 'other' bus became visible at the rear entrance (where a door was supposed to be present).. I couldn't believe my eyes on what I saw next.. In the hand of the conductor was my cell phone and he was signaling me to calm down saying it is safe with him..

I was handed over the cell phone once both the buses stopped.. Today if I lose a thing which is 50 times more expensive than that cell phone, then too I wouldn't repeat the acts I did that day.. All that happened in a rush of blood.. But that is not the part I ponder about.. Rather, it is those two people, and their real life heroism that I witnessed that day is what I muse about.. It was an act of integrity, an act of pure goodness, an act of complete selflessness with no personal interests involved.. It gave me the opportunity to witness the pure goodness which I wish to have inside me and the goodness which we seek in others.. Most surprising thing is the way everything synced up perfectly.. It was very much possible that in spite of the best efforts put in by the driver, I would have ended up not getting my cell, had it landed in the hands of some other person who might have decided to act otherwise.. Even in that case, I would have praised the bus driver equally and would have been grateful to the same extent.. But as if to give a fitting finish to the whole thing, conductor of the other bus came into picture..

It still amazes me how things fell into place perfectly that day.. When I think of my cell getting stolen purposefully (Act of theft is always done in full consciousness), I wonder how different people behave differently in same set of conditions.. This world is a bizarre place, full of weirdness.. There are people who don't/ won't hesitate to kill others in cold blood for the sake of personal benefits and we also get to hear about people who don't think twice to risk their own lives to save a stranger! Of course I am certainly not going to brood and write over the human behavior, but such incidents certainly give some interesting insights.. I am not a great supporter of giving a conclusion for any or a set of events because we are living in a vibrant world which is ever evolving.. So certainly, nothing is conclusive..

But that incident reinforced my belief that this world is full of nice people with big hearts and with good intentions for others.. And that incident reinforced my belief that goodness, kindness, honesty, integrity, righteousness, truthfulness, compassion, gentleness, sympathy, humanity are not the mere words; for they do exist in reality.. We just need to imbibe the real meaning of these..

A Book Review on "Animal Farm"

I had read this beautiful book 'Animal Farm' when I was in 10+2.. Had written a book review on this book for a newsletter two years back.. Just wanted to share the same, so posting that book review here..

BOOK REVIEW: Animal Farm By George Orwell

Animal Farm is a masterpiece by George Orwell and was published in year 1945. It is counted among the best ever English Language novel. This story is a reflection of real world circumstances which prevailed during the period of Russian Revolution and second world war and ridicules the political system existing all over the world. Story starts with Manor, an Animal Farm with a character called Mr. Jones as its owner who is in total control of the farm and all the animals living there. Needless to say, he makes the animals over work and in return, gives them little. This reflects the dictatorship in which rights of people were assaulted by the rulers. As it happens always, suppression results to revolution and same happened at the Animal Farm too.
  
The oldest pig, named Old Major assembles all animals in a meeting and tells them about a dream which he had and motivates them with his vision for a revolt against the owner of the farm. He tells them the value of freedom and the great change that the revolution would bring in their lives. He tells them of a day when all animals will live and work together with no human beings to control them. He went on to give them an inspiring song called "Beasts of England". And one fine night, the reigns of the farm was taken over by the animals as they chased off the owner Mr. Jones from the field. 


This great victory was followed by a whole sea of changes and for the proper functioning; responsibilities were assigned to each individual. And from here, things started taking a new face again. George Orwell has illustrated the real life scenario of a political system in a beautiful manner. How power makes the person act differently and how greed creeps in. Once having thrown the old owner, and after the death of Old Major, Pigs declared themselves as the decision makers and introduced new and unfair regulations, and then they went on to create a hierarchy in the society with Pigs being at the top of it. They ensured to have all comforts and make others believe that they’re doing the most tedious job, "thinking", which requires a lot of effort. So Pigs started deciding about the sort of work which’s to be done in the farm and finding out who will work where, will do what and who is best fitted for any particular role, which will be "best" for "society". They went on to establish a number of commandments supposedly based on the principle of Animalism but in reality were something entirely different. Various animals of the story symbolize a number of characters of real life. Pigs represent the wisest creatures and the shrewd politicians with all the power at their expense. They took all the decisions though they themselves didn’t do anything except conspiring to keep the animals from uniting. Cats represent the section that benefited most without any efforts just by cheap gimmicks like spreading rumors and praising the Pigs. Dogs represent the cold hearted brutal army who were ready to kill anyone just at the order of the Pigs. There is an excellent portrayal of a character Boxer, the horse who is blindly loyal to the decision makers and irrespective of the pains that he has to go through, his loyalty and mindset doesn't change and in the end he ends up paying with his life. Old donkey Benjamin reflects the wise and practical people who neither approve of the wrong deeds nor revolt.


Orwell has illustrated that though the face of exploiter changed, the plight of common people remained same as their interest took a backseat as soon as power came in the hand of people who had promised them a better life.


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P.S.: There are certain things in life which compel us to share it with people whom we know.. This book is one of those.. It is not simply a story book, it's an experience in itself! So I will mark it as a 'must read'.. I will be glad to share the eBook (PDF format) of this if  someone accosts me for it..

Aussies Reinforce Australianism

Aussies have pulled off an incredible victory to knock-off Pakistan and reach the final of T20 World Cup 2010!! More than the victory, it was the manner in which they won! Needing 48 runs in 17 balls with 7 wickets down and requiring 18 off last over; Mike Hussey led the charge from the front and saw the Aussies through.. When chips were really down, Sr Hussey kept his cool and clobbered Saeed Ajmal for Six, Six, Four and Six off consecutive balls and saw Aussies through with a ball to spare..

Personally speaking, this victory is good for the brand of Cricket, because thanks to the silly format  of tourney, Pakistan were on the brink of going into final just by winning three games (which would have included this match and one against Bangladesh).. They won the World Cup in similar fashion last year where they didn't even play against  four out of top seven teams and lost against one of the rest three!

But they played some fabulous cricket in this match.. Surprising to see that Aussies opted to field first in a high voltage pressure match after wining the toss and had almost blew it away!

But at the end of the day, it's the Aussies who prevailed over all the odds reinforcing the "Australianism"; Famously written by John Arlott in 1948 after the victory of Don Bradman's team over England on english soil. 

"Australianism", wrote Arlott, "means single-minded determination to win - to win within the laws but, if necessary, to the last limit within them. It means where the 'impossible' is within the realm of what the human body can do, there are Australians who believe that they can do it - and who have succeeded often enough to make us wonder if anything is impossible to them. It means they have never lost a match - particularly a Test match - until the last run is scored or their last wicket down."

Nice thoughts! Certainly some good points to learn..

With England team on a roll, looking forward to a thrilling final..

Reloading Life..

Last few days were difficult.. Felt miserable for most of the time.. Called up few friends to talk about 'something'/ 'anything'.. didn't work.. Tried to watch TV, that too didn't work.. Switched on to music and that proved to be even more fatal!.. Tried to read, but my mind was wandering, wondering about all the things and nothing in particular at the same time..

It is then, I thought I will give a try to this.. A friend had suggested one blog which has some really good positive stuff.. "Wo positive likhti hain" (She writes positive stuff), I had been told sternly (yes sternly) when I got to know about that blog.. Well, when you are feeling really low, then all this talk of how one should always be positive doesn't really help.. Rather, at times it annoys, because then one who is in the rot wonders, "Who doesn't want to be positive?" We start reasoning within our mind unnecessarily which exacerbates the whole thing.. It happens to me as well and at times I feel that in one way or another, I am espousing the negativity.. Do I really want to do that? Of course no.. Then why does this happens? Answer is, because we try to argue and reason with ourselves over the things which we should not be doing; because they are either the things of past with no strings attached using which we can pull them back and fix them up or they are the things which are really beyond our control.. Most difficult part about this issue is; it is slightly tricky to recognize the whole trap.. I mean, most of the times we don't realize we are getting engulfed in the stream of negative thoughts.. It is like walking on a road which offers you two paths diverging in completely different directions, yet they look so much alike initially when we start treading it, just running parallel to each other for a long time and then they start diverging and before you realize you are at a place where you didn't expected yourself to be.. The best option to avoid getting in such a scenario is to stop.. Stop and do something else..

I read that blog, not everything, but some of the articles, trying to guess from the names, the extent of negativity/ positivity in the contents.. And I was in for a surprise.. Surprise because the pessimist part of me was in for a big disappointment and the optimist part of me was certainly getting its veins flooded with the fluids of positivity.. To say the least, it made me see the things in a different perspective..

I don't say that I will never feel low again, there are very good chances that I will.. Because our own complicated neurons have made us this way that we don't accept anything on face value.. I cannot accept things dumb-folded.. I will keep questioning all my 'whys'.. But at least in due course of time, I will try to learn to not torture myself while questioning.. And I will certainly brood for the things for which there is solution and duck the ones which lead to nowhere..

When I got up today morning, felt the mist clearing-off a little and every passing second made me feel better.. ; "BCCI mulling to sack Dhoni from the captainship", read the headline of the newspaper.. "England is through to final while Aussies will take up Pakistan in the second semifinal for T20 World Cup today" was the content of another page.. Then there're the news on other things, other happenings of the previous day.. "This world is evolving and changing everyday", I thought.. Everything, every object, be it the living one or the non-living, together with the time defined by the moments is a part of the big transformation which we know as the Universe.. We all are an eternal part of this transformation.. That is why we say, "Life goes on".. "Then why did I stop?", I thought.. Certainly it's the time to 're-load' the life.. For, in spite of all the negativities, there are positive things to pick; for every dusk on-setting darkness, we have a dawn the following day bringing in the glorious sunshine; for, beautiful colors scattered in nature still soothe the eyes and fragrances of flowers still smell of sweetness; for, the cool breeze on our face still feels so good and sky still looks so serene after a heavy downpour of rain; for, twinkling stars spread all over the sky in night still exalt the horizons reminding us how vast yet beautiful this world is; for, when the world is still asleep in the wee hours, sweet chirruping of birds tell us the real meaning of tranquility.. For, along with the grieves and tears, sadness and solitude; also coexist within the contours of the same world the smiles and happiness, the innocent giggles and joyous laughter’s and also the sense of tenderness and care.. For, not everyone responds with the cold looks but there are also the people who really care.. If imperfections have not been able to make this world completely imperfect with all the evilness, then why to give up and why not to give a little try, no matter how small, for every iota of positivity added counts.. Why not to think that every adverse condition is a way of nature giving us an opportunity to contribute, to give back something to life..


More than anything else; why to simply exist and why not to live the life in real sense? For, In spite of all the negativities, this world is still a beautiful place to live in and yes.. 'Life is indeed beautiful'....

Remembering You..

Today it's ten years since you left and we still feel the void you left behind.. In all these years, a lot of things have changed around us, and a lot has changed inside us as well.. To say that we really miss you will be the biggest understatement of our lives.. In all the ups and downs, all the happy and sad moments, we missed you.. We really wished you to be around, but we know that it is no more possible..

And I am sorry, I no more get into painting, for somehow colors have ceased to attract me.. I no more feel that enthusiasm which I used to feel when I used to show you my paintings, bearing the wetness of the water colors used.. I do a little bit of shading though, still using the 2B and 5B pencil.. And the eyes that I sketch and shade; they still come perfect, as if holding the looks of the person who sees it; as you used to tell me.. And I never use my palm to spread the shade on the paper, I only use the pencil strokes, just the way you used to tell me to do..

And I am no more lean and thin and don't keep on running and jumping the stairs either.. So there is no need to worry, I won't trip down.. And I have learnt how to shave properly; it is very simple and I never cut my chin.. And of course I have grown up, but I didn't go on to become 6 feet tall as you used to tell me I would.. I am no more a school going boy as you had seen me last.. I am doing a job now after completing my engineering.. But I couldn't make it to IITs.. I am sorry, I know I have let you and Babuji down.. But I know that you will forgive me.. And we use computer in our everyday life now, just the way we used to imagine in those days.. Of course we have it in our home also; and that too, two of them..

And you will be happy to know that I kept my promise that I will never drink or smoke.. I never did till now and I will never do ever in future either.. It is not just the compulsion of the promise; instead, I too feel it that this is the correct decision..

And you were right; it really hurts to be a little more sensitive.. When you used to tell me this in those days, I didn't even know properly what does really being an emotional person means in real sense? But I do understand now and what I don't understand is how do many people manage to be not-so-emotional.. When happiness and sadness holds the same meaning for everyone then how do some people manage to not understand how these two things make others feel? No I am not angry, I am just a bit confused..

We no more live in our home; we shifted after Babuji left us.. It had become increasingly difficult for all of us to continue there after so much had happened.. At times I still see it in my dreams, but don't know why, I never see it as the same sweet home which it used to be for us.. It looks scary and dark.. I really don't like it that way, so I try my best to not think about it to avoid it coming in my dreams again..

I still read a lot of books and write a little bit.. But who ever reads them says that they lack humor.. I am clueless how to bring that in my writing.. And don't think that I brood over the things a lot.. I do that, but just a little; when I have no one around me.. Earlier I used to vent out everything by crying when alone, but I have controlled that now.. I think I have hardened and matured.. I really make it a point to smile a lot, for most of the people around you feel comfortable only if you are smiling.. Otherwise either they become worried or distant and I don't like to get any of those responses.. And I don't want anyone at home to get worried either, so we all try to keep things light.. It is only Maa who finds it hardest to control the emotions, but we have somehow managed to make her smile again..

Off late, we have learnt to discuss about our old days, days of past, days of our childhood.. Not many days ago, it used to feel like that period before 12th May-2000 was some other life, then the following period up to 18th March-2007 was again another life and the time period after that is our true present.. But now, we have started to open up a little.. But we are still unable to discuss about you, for we still feel very uncomfortable and grief clouds our heart.. We mention Babuji in our conversation sometimes, but after that an impeding silence follows.. I really hope that this will change someday..

I was really feeling very low today, but again somehow managed to handle it.. I never make any efforts to think about negative things, but some times they somehow tend to engulf my thoughts.. It happens all of a sudden; at times when I am talking to someone, or reading something, or travelling, or eating.. almost at any time.. I just feel this uneasiness, some kind of heaviness in my heart.. Re-realization of the fact that I will never see you and Babuji ever again in my life makes me feel choked; I feel a lump in my throat, it pains also, then I find that my vision is blurred with tears and then I realize that I am about to cry.. I really hate this happening to me because it soaks off a lot of energy; I don't like being sad, no one does.. I like being happy, I like to smile; I want to smile, like everyone else does.. So I do take precautions.. I avoid being alone and I call up friends when I feel I am about to be in that condition again.. But I avoid facing Maa in such conditions for somehow she always manages to know that am sad.. So I call up few friends and talk about anything, just to divert my mind and it has been working just fine.. Only thing is, at times they get confused for usually in such conditions, I don't know what to talk about and keep pushing them to talk about 'something' or 'anything' and they wonder why on earth did I called up! They are really very nice, my good friends and I am grateful to them for the favor they do to me unknowingly..

Few days ago I got to see our old albums, pictures of the time when I was not born.. But you were there.. And then the snaps in which you were small and I was smaller.. I saw many other old pics in which all of us are together.. Initially I felt that someone has taken out my heart and has squeezed it mercilessly.. But then I felt better.. Now I see those pics when I am alone and I don't cry watching them.. I feel they are the threads which join me with the time when we all were together.. Some of them are in really bad condition, so I am planning to get their copies made in some good studio this weekend..

I can't imagine you and Babuji to be with god for I can't imagine of a god who is insensitive, who inflicts pain on people who trust him.. And I really feel miserable.. Where have you gone? In some null oblivion? I don't want to think of this.. I never want to have the state of mind where you are forgotten.. I always remember you and Babuji and always miss both of you..

I know that you are not going to read these lines, they hold no meaning.. But still there are some beliefs which keep us going.. I would like to believe that we will meet again in some different world; even if this belief costs me to accept the existence of god..

I just want to make this little promise to me that I will not let my emotions affect the future.. I will not let the negativity eat me up, for I believe in the trust you and Babuji had in me and I want to live up to that..

And right now my vision is not blurred with tears.. But I miss you, I really do..

India Makes An Early Exit From T20 World Cup -- Deja Vu..

In yet another disappointing display, Team India failed to deliver the goods in a must win situation; a game, victory in which would have kept the hopes alive to book a seat in the semis.. It was again the same old story of poor strategy and even worse execution..

As soon as the match started, it was baffling to see Dhoni opting to field (after winning the toss) in a must win situation match.. It is really very difficult to understand what makes the captain(s) decide to opt to field in a high pressure match.. If we go back a little, we will realize that luck has been on India's side in all such crunch matches and it's the skippers who made the wrong calls.. I will list quite a few of those below from what I remember:

• World Cup 1996 Semifinal match against Sri Lanka: Md Azharuddin made the right call in toss but surprisingly opted to field on a underprepared pitch at Eden Garden, Calcutta.. Opening ceremony of the World Cup had been organized at the same venue just a month ago leaving the organizers very little time to prepare a quality wicket.. Sri Lanka scored 251 in 50 0vers and in second inning the bowl started turning square and except Sachin, no one could handle the things.. India had made a paltry 120/8 in 34 overs, staring at a certain defeat when the crowd went berserk and match had to be stopped.. Sri Lanka were conceded the match.. A wrong call after toss costed India the match.. Even on a good batting pitch, chasing 250+ in a semifinal match would have been tough call..
• World Cup 2003 Semifinal match against Australia: Skipper Saurav Ganguly won the toss and elected to field! I still remember everyone in my hostel staring at the TV disbelievingly in utter frustration.. Cheer which was there moments before(after winning the toss) suddenly disappeared.. Aussies went on to score 359 in the alloted 50 overs which set them up for an emphatic victory and from there, it was just a matter of time for them to win the World Cup second time in a row.. India were all out on 234 and surrendered meekly against the mountain.. Yet another wrong decision after winning the toss had cost India dearly..
• World Cup 2007 First Round Match against Sri Lanka: This match was quite different from the previous two we talked about earlier since this match was for the survival in the World Cup.. After losing the match against minnows Bangladesh, India were in a embarrassing spot wherein they were to make the exit in the very first round! It was a high pressure match and a must win also.. India won the toss and yet again elected to field! Needless to say, things were too hot to be handled in 2nd inning and India made an early exit, worst one after the 1979 World Cup..
• T20 Word Cup 2009 against England: India were the defending T20 World Cup champions and this match was to decide their prospects for the semifinal spot.. Dhoni won the toss and no prizes for the right guess, elected to field.. India lost the one sided match and bowed out even before the semis..
• T20 2010 World Cup against West Indies: Today's match :(

It is a common sense thing in cricket that any crucial match comes with a lots of pressure.. Chasing any total is always a tricky things.. So it is surprising that no one made any observation about these facts which have cost the team on a number of occasions..

Coming back to today's match, there are several other things which come into mind.. Certainly, this team was not a well prepared one with several chinks in the armor.. Right since the onset of IPL, Team India priorities have taken a backseat for most of the players, mostly the younger lot.. It's not among the best kept secrets that how fragile we are technically against the rising bowl and the short pitch stuff.. Playing on the flat and slow pitches of India in IPL is comletely a different bowl game when compared with an International match, that too having the magnitude of World Cup.. There is a whole set of younger generation cricketers whose performance leaves a lot to be expected.. We have seen Rohit Sharma, Murali Vijay, Dinesh Kartik and few others going great guns in the IPL.. But they could not deliver when played for team India.. It shows the state of their mental preparedness.. Not just these players, even Dhoni, Raina, Yuvraj, Gambhir couldn't do much with the bat.. Except Sachin, Dravid and Laxman, we don't have any batsman who is comfortable against quality swing bowling on fast and bouncy tracks.. It is sad that the current lot is not bothered about it since they know that they will not be getting such tracks in most of the matches, at least in IPL matches.. Bowling department has always looked in jitters except for Harbhajan Singh.. Our pace bowlers couldn't perform well in the same conditions where average bowlers from opposition side made merry.. This is a department which really looks a matter of worry for India in coming years.. Most sad thing is the fact that a player of Sehwag's caliber giving more importance to IPL than the team India jersey.. Sehwag getting injured while playing in IPL (Or may be injury was there earlier too) and then opting out of World Cup certainly didn't do any good to the team's prospects..

As a matter of fact, it is very surprising that schedule of IPL (which ended just couple of days before the T20 world) didn't raise any eyebrows! With so much cricket being played, players are bound to pick injuries.. It's an enigma why no one ever thought over it..

So we are done in another World Cup.. Sure enough it will be soon forgotten.. Come July and there will be auctions for the 10 IPL teams.. I wonder, given a chance to choose between IPL and Team India, how many of our players will go for the second option.. Sad to see the game we grew up loving going in tatters..

May be we should get used to seeing our players performing in insignificant tourneys like IPL only..

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FURTHER UPDATES: Got some updates that India can still make it to semis provided they defeat Sri Lanka and Aussies defeat West Indies plus some calculations go India's way.. It worked for Pakistan and they are through to semis now even though they have won just a single match in Super Eight! Strange format.. but still it's the one being used.. Keeping my fingers crossed for India's semis prospects..


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The end meant disappointment.. We are finally officially out of 3rd edition of T20 World Cup.. But our players do have 4th edition of IPL and more than that, auction of the 4th edition of IPL to look forward to..

Thoughts Of A Wandering Mind -- The Rickshaw Puller

This is not a story, this is a real incident which came up during the general conversation I was having with my Mother today.. It happened with a distant relative, a maternal Uncle of mine.. He was on his way to railway station to board a train.. He had taken a rickshaw to reach there.. Railway station was a little far from his home and somehow he had managed to put himself in a situation wherein he had touch and go hopes to board the train.. In his quest to reach the destination in time, he started requesting the rickshaw puller to cycle fast.. Noting that his requests didn't have the desired effect, his desperation grew and requests took the shape of yelling.. Continuous yelling too didn't help him either and by the time he reached station, the train had already left, ignorant of the fact that one of the passengers has not boarded the train despite yelling his lungs out at the poor rickshaw puller all through his way to the station.. And here they're; my poor uncle and the poorer rickshaw puller having his dose of curses for being so lazy and discovering that he was no good at doing anything, even with pulling a rickshaw.. Poor fellow heard everything with his head bowed in complete silence, just waiting for being handed over his well deserved money (or not ?), for carrying his passenger from a fair enough distance in the sweltering heat.. While paying the rickshaw puller, my uncle didn't waste one more opportunity to vent out the still brimming anger.. "It looks you have not had any food since ages!", He said.. The rickshaw puller just accepted the fair thankfully and while carefully tucking it in his pocket, said in a low voice with intense pain, "Not since ages sir, but last three days.. Lost my only son few days ago.." He wanted to say more but couldn't muster the courage; decided otherwise and went away with a quite move on his rickshaw, leaving my uncle wondering what to reply and how to react..

This incident occurred many years ago and still, on hearing this, I can't help but think and feel the pain, the helplessness and the anguish of the poor fellow.. At times I get hurt when I feel that I have been misunderstood, or not understood, or have not been cared or treated the way I would have liked to be.. But we have several unfortunate people for whom these things are a luxury.. Their sole aim everyday is to make both ends meet, for whom every day is a whole new set of struggles, a struggle for survival, a struggle to have food, a struggle to remain alive! And if they lose a dear one, then they must bury the grief deep inside, for the life doesn't offers them the luxury to weep their hearts out at the unrepairable loss they have suffered.. They can't brood over the grief that they will not see that face of that loved one because if they chose to do that, they run into the risk of remaining hungry in their thatched houses that whole day and the following night too.. And when they will get up the next morning, they will be way too weak for crying, leave alone earning the livelihood..

Wise people have said that God gives everyone just as much which is good for that person.. With due respect, I will prefer to disagree here.. Either these wise people are not so wise OR God seriously needs to fix the device he is using to calculate for deciding how much should be given to everyone! I might not be having the wisdom to question this, but one thing is for sure that I understand what is happiness and what is grief.. If we try to see the distribution pattern of these two things in the world then one thing is certain that God has not been fair.. None of the great logics and arguments given by the great wise people with infinite wisdom can satisfy me on this.. I am very much aware of the fact that what I think doesn't makes any difference to the world, but they do to me.. And at the end of the day, that is what that matters most.. We all trust the things after gaining understanding about the specific thing or object in question, but if we trust something without putting any logic behind it; just because we have been taught since generations, then that is what we call blind faith.. And blind faith is like a mirage which always takes us far from reality.. I choose to see the desert instead of a mirage..

Coming to an end, I will not make any attempt to get these lines to a conclusion.. These are some open questions, some facts which will remain there till eternity.. Some people will always remain more fortunate, more affluent while many others will have their destinies full of hardships.. There will always be the similar rickshaw pullers paddling with empty bellies and dried tears which could never come out of the eyes..

Don't know who is controlling our strings.. Certainly, perfection doesn't sounds to be a true word..

Making a comeback.. An insignificant event..

It is said that small turn of events lead to big things. I wholly agree to this well proved fact. As a matter of fact, I would go on further and add here that small turn of events lead to many small things out of which some may go on and take the shape of something really BIG while most of them may remain relatively small. But one thing is for certain that irrespective of the fact that how BIG or small they might be, each of them very well serve their respective purpose.

I know, this whole talk of big and small, small and big is turning somewhat boring as well as confusing. Not the best way to hit back to blogging or rather say re-blogging. So let me tell you about some more interesting things. But before that I would like to share with you the story behind that 'Big and Small thing' talk. No I won't bore you again, I promise..

I received a mail from a dear friend inviting me to have a look at her first blog. I clicked on the provided URL and here it was.. a beautiful but sad story (Yes, beautiful things can be sad and vice versa). It definitely caught my interest, and I have multiple reasons for it. It had a good content, the language used was beautiful and more than anything else, it was presented perfectly describing and depicting every detail carefully with the skill of an expert artist filling in the colors on the canvas.. So coming back to 'small turn of events lead to small/ big things'; this beautiful blog led to a small thing.. It led me to think.. No it's not that I am not into the habit of thinking, I certainly am.. But it made me think of something which may be I had been postponing since a long time.. and that is writing.. Certainly a 'small' thing which will/ should lead to many other small things (at least).. That particular blog made me remember that somewhere within the realms of www, I too have a blog space which has quite a few depressing stuff.. I later discovered something more depressing; the fact that I have forgotten the URL/ Site/ complete whereabouts of my previously posted blogs!! I know this is height of carelessness, I know this is what we call stupidity in true spirit.. But one thing is sure, this 'whole turn of event' ensured the fact that I will at least re-initiate my efforts towards my writing ambitions.. "If not now then when stupid?" I said to myself. Certainly I am not going to get another set of brand new life to pursue this..

I hope that I will not go back to my sleep again and will be writing regularly now onwards instead of letting the things die down in my thoughts only..

There are many stories to be told, several thoughts to be shared.. Wishing me a Happy Blogging!!